DAY 16

26 Feb 2013

A regular start to our day apart from having Kadyn coming in to say good morning to baby.  That was nice.  Pau didn’t start work until about midday so it was great to spend the morning together.  We spent our afternoon with the family out and about in Tawa and Porirua having lunch and shopping.  Baby is not yet used to nan but enjoys being entertained by Kadyn.  He loves talking to her and laughing with her.

DAY 15

25 Feb 2013

Pau was making so much noise this morning as she was getting ready for work.  So it’s an early morning for me (5.30am).  OMG! The sun is still sleeping!!  I’m rolling around on the bed trying to get back to sleep but just my luck, baby wakes up as I’m about to fall asleep lol. 

Limited breast milk today so baby will be on formula.  She was not used to the taste of formula so there was a bit of trouble getting her to drink all of her bottle but we will get there I suppose.  I think going for a walk will help settle her.

Baby and I are off to the train station to meet my grandmother (nan) and my 4 year old cousin Kadyn. They are travelling over from Masterton in the car but are not sure how to get to our place so we will meet them at the train station and show them the way.  Nan brought over my sister Aria’s old car seat so we didn’t have to worry about carting a car seat with us.  This car seat will be used as a spare.  Baby was a little unsure of them at first but hopefully she will remember them as they are staying with us for a few days. 

Baby screamed all the way home, possibly due to having formula and a sore bottom.  We have changed baby’s barrier cream, more frequent nappy changes and loads of nappy free time. 

We spent most of the afternoon hanging out and enjoying spending time together.  It was nan’s birthday so we all went out for dinner and baby enjoyed rubbing her gums on the bottle of ice cold water.

Click on the link below for something that we found helpful.

Kiwi families and nappy rash

DAY 14

24 Feb 2013

Good morning everyone!!!

Pau has spent the morning tending to baby. Thanks Pau.  Today we are off to town with Shaun and mum for brunch, yum yum!  We were lucky enough to catch the Chinese New Year parade, so baby was entertained for a little while.

On our way home we picked up a few movies for a relaxing evening.  What a great way to spend a Sunday!

DAY 13

23 Feb 2013

Baby got up late today (9.30am) so will have to see how she goes today.  She’s been hanging out with Pau most of the morning.  This afternoon I’m off car seat shopping with mum and Shaun (mum’s partner).  Baby is getting too big for her baby capsule.

Going shopping with mum and Shaun is great as they aren’t shy to pull a range of car seats out to look over.  We didn’t find a suitable car seat at shop one so headed off to the next baby store.  Shop two had a wider range of car seats.  Prices ranged from $220 - $699 and none of these included the car lol.  We finally settled on a car seat that suits our needs (front and rear facing, reclining, padded straps, secure base, standards compliant, adjustable, “fashionable” and complete with safety locking clip).  Then we tested the car seat to ensure the seat belts fit the car seat, yay! 

Thanks mum and Shaun for taking me to get the car seat.

Sharns tips for car seat shopping:

• Take your time–you may need to go to more than one shop to find the car seat that you  want; 
• Look at all of the components of the car seat; 
• Is it suitable for your baby to be in for extended periods of time (comfortable); 
• Ask questions (or take someone with you who will ask questions); 
• Don’t be pressured into buying something you don’t want or can’t afford; 
• Ensure it meets compliance standards; 
• Think about the durability factor (fabric, colour, robustness); 
• Has a locking clip; and, 
• Vehicle seat belts fit.

DAY 12

22 Feb 2013

Pau, baby and myself ended up sleeping in the lounge on the mattresses so Pau and I could watch Sky all night lol.  Therefore we had a little bit of trouble sticking to our morning routine and baby wasn’t ready for her morning nap at the usual time.  I did find a good solution (thanks mum!).  I put baby in her pushchair and wheeled her back and forth over the little bumps inside.  I used the bump that joins the carpeted area in the dining room to the lino of the kitchen which seemed to work wonders.  I even took off my slippers and lined them up so the wheels rolled over them so we had a few things in the house to push the pushchair over – then off to sleep she went.

Baby has been a little/big chatterbox today.  She has been going non-stop (must get that from mum hehe). We had a visitor today and baby was showing off doing her shy eyes lol soooo cute.

Day 11

21 Feb 2013

Sticking to our routine when baby wakes up.  It seems to be working well.  Baby’s morning nap time provides the opportunity for me to also have a nap or get the washing out.  Its been great with the warm weather – opportunities to get outside, washing dries easily and little wind (this is a change for Wellington lol).

Today baby and I went to lunch with my mum in Johnsonville.  We also took the time to have a meeting about Daddys Do Care. 

There are so many things to get ready for our outing.  Even though baby’s bag has most of her things in there already, I always check to make sure that we have nappies, cream, wipes, baby food, bibs, clothes and a blanket.  I also ensure the car seat and pushchair is where it should be.  Then there is my bag...

I have found that having our outings after baby’s morning nap and before lunch is the ideal time.  She is well rested and eager to look around and take in the sights.  She loves sitting in her pushchair and watching all the people passing by.

While waiting for our lunch we get into our meeting while baby plays happily in her pushchair. There is so much to discuss as we get ready to get Daddys Do Care (phase one) up and running. 

Back home now and baby is having her playtime and tummy time.  Pau is home now while I get into cooking dinner.  Then it is into our night time routine with dinner, bath, cuddles and ready for bed.

Night night baby, see you in the morning.

DAY 10

20 Feb 2013

Wow, what a good start to the day, not eventful but baby has a new “thing”.  She has started nodding her head, its like she is doing the Kiwi greeting “what’s up” lol.  So there has been lots of encouragement to get her to keep doing it.  Now I’m showing her how to shake her head like saying no...its early days.

DAY 9

19 Feb 2013

Pau has the day off today so we are having a family day at home.  Its been a pretty cruisy day really.  I did some washing, the dishes, cooked lunch and played with baby.

It was really handy having Pau home to share the work.

I have been thinking there are a few things that Pau and I need to work on, particularly baby’s routine and consistency so baby doesn’t get confused or just cry to be picked up all of the time.  This will help make everyone’s life easier – especially mine.

DAY 8

18 Feb 2013

Good morning baby.  Its nice to wake up with baby again.  We all survived our first week.

All went to plan following our routine, until it was playtime...baby didn’t want to sit on me, lie down and play, tummy time, not even her jumper.  Nothing seemed to settle her apart from me carrying her around.  At first I wondered if she is teething...or did she have a weekend of everyone carrying her around!?!  I’m not sure what happened but it was not a pleasant day, most of it was spent crying. 

When Pau got home and was settled I asked if she could deal with baby for a bit.  Would you believe that baby was fine from then on lol and had loads of smiles.  I was thinking “you little monkey!”

I am fortunate to have other people (Pau, my mother, my mother’s partner, my siblings and my father) to support me and give me time out and share the responsibility. I hope that all dads have a support system.  My hope is that this blog will encourage other dads to feel comfortable in sharing their experiences.

DAY 7

17 Feb 2013

Its 8.00pm and I just got back from my weekend away.  It was great to spend time with friends but really missed baby.  Two minutes after I got in the door, baby and Pau got home (YAY!). Baby was fast asleep when she got back but as soon as she woke up it was snuggle time for her and I.  It was daddy time – playing and talking (noises and sounds), she is sooo cute.  

Night night everyone.

DAY 6

16 Feb 2013

A bit weird this morning waking up with no baby to put a smile on my face but I guess that’s what photos are for.  Spent most of the day laxing in Palmy before heading off to Filly.

DAY 5

15 Feb 2013

A bit of a sleep in this morning, yay. Baby was up late last night with nan (Oops, screaming her head off), she went to sleep just before we got home.  Then it was playtime with baby practicing rolling over then off for her morning nap.  She had lots of tummy time when she woke up.  Pau and her aunty arived because they are off to Lower Hutt for the weekend.  All packed up and off they went :(  I decided that I would spend my weekend with friends in Palmerston North (Palmy) and Fielding (Filly).

DAY 4

14 Feb 2013

Valentines Day

Baby got up super early today (6.30am), come on, it was early for me but I guess I need to be getting used to that.  I was so tired lol (it doesn’t help that I play on the xbox till late) so I got up and put her in her jumper for a few minutes while I lay on the floor for a few more minutes (what would I do without a jumper?).

Right my eyes have focused and I’m ready for the day, shower, playtime, bottle and nap – we are on a roll.  When baby got up it was tummy time, she is enjoying it more and more. 

We went to meet Pau down the road after she finished work and all headed off to baby’s appointment at Plunket.  Baby is growing well and brain development is good too.  After Plunket it was the mish (mission) up Ngaio mountain. O.M.G.  We made it obviously or I wouldn’t be writing this but damn what a hike.  

Thanks to Nan (my mother) we could go out tonight.  Pau and I started to get ready for our date while baby played.  So, bottles, clothes, nappies and all the other things they might need were all ready and off Pau and I went.  It was good for the two of us to have some time to hang out and do whatever we wanted.  We ended up down on the waterfront (it was Salsa night – Every Thursday) then dinner at Nandos lol.  We ended our night by going to the movies (Hansel and Gretel 3D).  After all of our activities we got home around 11.00pm.  Baby was asleep in the lounge in the portacot (cuuute) so we shifted her downstairs and to bed we went.  What an awesome night.

DAY 3

13 Feb 2013

Well we had an early start this morning, didn’t want to get out of bed so we rolled around in bed for about half an hour before we headed upstairs and had a shower.  I think it's best for us to wash in morning so I can wake up.  I organise her toys and mat so she plays while I shower before she gets in.  This is all part of working out our routine.  We will give things a go for a week and see if they are working or if we need to alter them. 

Lets see how we go with the bottle again.  She is drinking from the bottle but isn’t quite used to it yet.  Baby didn’t have a very long nap so she’ll be tired again soon. 

Well its tummy time now but her legs started kicking out when she realises its Jolly Jumper time.  She loves jumping and laughing.   I set up the full length mirror in front of her so she can see what she is doing. 

Later we head outside and she was fascinated by the grass and flowers moving in the breeze – so she decides to try and dive for them.  Great fun spent outdoors.

This afternoon we headed to Lower Hutt with Pau when she finished work.  It was great to get out of the house.  We went into the Parents Room so baby could be fed and changed.  I went to use the toilet available.  Walking out I was confronted by a mum.  She obviously had some issues about me being in the parents room, my guess was that it was because I was a male.  Who said that a parents room was meant only for women.  I was shocked by this behaviour (I guess I shouldn’t have been, as this is becoming obvious to me) so told her how it was and gave her “the eyes”.  You know what I mean, similar to how women roll their eyes but the male version.  Other than that it was a great day out.

DAY 2

12 Feb 2013

Well as you can see both baby and I survived our first day.  Now day 2 begins.  We both ended up having a nap this morning for about an hour.  I think I’m going to enjoy this part of the day!   Baby is not used to having a bottle but we are getting there. 

She spent time in her Jolly Jumper today.  Yes, I know some people don’t like them and many discourage against using them. Our decision is that we are going to use it.  This allows her to see everything that is going on around her while having some fun and working her legs.  I tried to teach her how to hit things. This went pretty well – I only got hit once lol.  We had the wooden spoon and a bucket.  I showed her how to hit the bucket with the spoon and then it was her turn.   Coordination is not great yet but one day she might want to be a drummer so we have to start somewhere. 

Baby had loads of fun – hitting the door, the wall, the bucket and yes, herself.  She is used to being entertained and getting picked up when she wants.  Hmmm this is something we will have to work on.

Who said staying at home was easy?!?!

Sometimes there is an expectation that because you are home you have nothing to do.  Guess what, its a full time job – feeding, changing, playing, soothing and then there is the housework.  I think I’m getting there though, including doing the dishes, laundry and vacuuming.  What a domestic god I'm becoming lol!

DAY 1

11 Feb 2013

Well guys it’s my first real day of daddy duties.  Baby and I are going to be working on a routine, which I hope won’t take more than a few days.  There was lots of crying at first today which was to be expected.  The one crying was baby, not me lol.  Baby is getting used to Pau (baby’s mum) not being around when she wants. 

Today baby has had lots of tummy and back time – so she can roll over more often. Looks like there is going to be lots of time rolling on the floor for me, yay.  Baby had a bit of pureed fruit today and 3 bottles before Pau came home.  I think everything went pretty well. 

Wish me luck everyone.

Welcome to Daddys Do Care

Welcome to the Daddys Do Care blog.  This is where I get to share my diary with all of you.  The Daddys Do Care diary is phase one of the bigger Daddys Do Care project.  This project seeks to enable and encourage fathers to play an active role in their children’s lives.  It supports the notion that fathers are a vital and integral part of their children’s development. 

My name is Sharn Webster.  I am 21 years old and am a first time father to a baby girl.  A few weeks ago my daughter’s mum headed back to work while I have the amazing responsibility of being at home to be with my daughter.  Just over a month ago my mother and I were discussing this and wanted to ensure that I had a secure safety net around our new situation.  The majority of my close friends live in another city while we live here in Wellington.  Although we have a large extended family we have limited family living close by.  I wondered if there are any other dads in a similar situation and how we could support each other.  We have all heard about mum’s coffee groups,  play groups and the like for their children and I questioned whether dads would feel comfortable attending or would they even be welcome.  So I thought to myself...why don’t I just create something similar.  This has since grown into a range of ideas to ensure that my baby and I have a positive experience that we want to share with other dads.  We want to promote the benefits of being an active father.

From time to time there will be updates and polls available.  We ask that you be mindful that this blog is about my experiences as I hope they will offer some assistance to others who might be in a similar situation. 

As a family we welcome your support as we progress through our journey together.   Sit back and enjoy.